Maybe someday

I keep telling myself that eventually I will make it back to regular postings in this! I keep thinking "As the baby gets older maybe I will have time".....Wow can we say naive? I have absolutely had NO more time than I did 4 months ago. Of course I keep adding more things to my proverbial plate and this could be why. I happen to have a serious issue, as soon as I see free time in my days on a regular basis I cram something new into it. I started selling Mary Kay about 2 Months ago. It is going so slow I am questioning why I even did it. My team leader makes so much money that I thought "Hey that looks neat". I should have reminded myself that Nikki had experience is sales, and me, well I am a darn good waitress/carry-out girl. Nikki was a Realtor, then she sold Cars and then insurance. Nikki is the type of girl that can sell an Ice cube to a penguin in Antarctica at full price. She is just plain amazing. It seems like no matter how many sales, promotions and freebies I advertise I am just getting no were. She is supposed to help me out and teach me some sales tools so maybe I can get more business. Here is to hoping.

Nate and I started attending Church, And we really like it! We are going to First Christian Church in Junction City. I love it, and we are also doing some private Bible study with the pastor on Wednesday night. We are really getting into this, and even inviting friends. I like it, it makes me feel more at peace with everything. Ironically though it seems like if you tell people that you are going to Church the automatically assume something is wrong in your marriage or you're dying. Apparently you aren't to find Jesus without a traumatic event! I can say it has helped us not be so negative, but we definitely weren't going through anything terrible.

After a long talk with Nikki (She was my friend well before this Mary Kay stuff) I came to realize I have become incredibly complacent in my life style and this is what was killing my heart about Nate's job. I mean in reality, Nate has had it pretty easy since coming home from Iraq. He has been here 2 years, and only gone to 1 school at another post and been in the field maybe 3 times. He hasn't done anything like that in the past year. No wonder the idea of deployment/NTC makes me want to scream. I have gotten used to saying "I need you home" and him getting the day off. Recently that hasn't been happening and I've let it bother me. She snapped me back to reality with "Tina you were so strong, you did 15 months without a second thought, what happened?"................ It sent me into my search for the big girl panties.......... Seriously why was I being an obnoxious puddle of goo? I mean he is in the Army after all, DUH he is going someplace and hello I got 2 years with him, that is amazing for the Army. What is my problem? That isn't to say I am not afraid of the "What if's" and the fact that he'll leave just before Elijah turns 1 and will miss allot of really cool stuff that happens between one and two is sad, but I can do this. We have a video camera, and I have cameras and internet!

Elijah was 10 pounds 12 ounces last weight check. I was a little annoyed because when we had him in on the 7th his normal Dr. said as long as he was gaining we weren't going to worry about the numbers. The graph weight gain, so as long as the line went up he wasn't concerned about the rate. Well the 20th was his 4 month evaluation and it wasn't Dr. Meng. It was some other pediatrician we'd never seen before and he kept telling me how he was concerned about the weight and this that and another. I called Dr. Meng and he said no, don't be worried, and everything was fine. We did learn Elijah may have asthma or just really bad allergies. There isn't much they can do for diagnosis right now as he is too small, we just have to watch him. I think its allergies, I have the worst allergies myself!!

I went back to the Dr. on the 27th. I no longer have to worry about cervical cancer!!I think it will always be on my mind but he said I had 3 clear biopsy's and that I was good to go for a year. I went on the 28th to my regular Dr. for allergy medication. I was a little irritated when he said to me "Well nursing Mom's don't have many options, They do make Formula you know. I think you should switch anyway, 4 months is good enough"...... I know there are at least 2 allergy medications you can take while nursing #1 and #2 who are you to tell me what to do as far as nursing? I mean honestly it bothered me allot. I love nursing, and I think its one of the reasons I am so close to my son. I plan to continue until he can get cows milk. He does get a supplement feeding maybe twice a day, no more than 8 oz of formula a day. Mostly because I just can't keep up but the rice/oatmeal cereal has really helped that. Plus he has started juice. I have only tried Apple and Grape so far as I am easing into it. I want to spot allergies as quickly as possible. He was so so with Apple but he LOVED the Grape. This kid is a sucker for Grape. Obviously its very diluted but he loves it none the less.

Other than that we are just being the cute happy family, I uploaded some videos to Facebook and I send pictures there all the time. Hope everyone is well and they can check out the videos.