I haven't really written in this in awhile, I've been using my old fashioned paper and pen journal more.

We recently moved into a nice house on post. A town home style vs. the apartment style we had before. So far they seem fairly sound proof. I asked/apologized to the neighbors about my hanging things on the walls the other night and they didn't even know I had. So that is a good sign. Much different then hearing every neighbors every move. We have a garage and 2 floors so it seems much bigger than our old house. We did our final walk through in the apartment yesterday and made it through without owing anything. Thank goodness too.

Elijah had surgery, but he was a trooper. I did okay with that. I cried some when they took him back and then when he woke up I could hear him crying through the door and I had some serious Mom anxiety about why they weren't coming to get us yet. Fortunately they did within about 2 minutes. I might have hurt someone otherwise. He bounced back pretty quick, and even within hours of being home he was trying to stand and walk around. He is crazy. His bandage fell off before it was supposed to but the the Dr didn't seem worried, and tonight will be his first bath since.

We had a Dr. appointment for Jonah, and everything looks great so far. Healthy baby boy. The lab on Riley did loose my urine test and my glucose test though. I have to repeat those. Freaking lab!

Elijah is getting closer and closer to what I assume will be walking. He gets on all 4's like he might crawl but then rather than doing that tries to tuck his legs under him and go. I am in trouble now!

Other than that, I've been having a lot on my mind lately so I've been using my other journal since some of it isn't so nice and frankly I don't think it's fair to be judged for emotions or thoughts by people. I think it is a combo of nerves about deployment, stress and hormones but either way it isn't comfortable thinking. I guess it's probably effecting both Nate and I but there isn't much to change that. I will just have to struggle through until he leaves, and then deal with it on my own or he will have to read the pink book because I don't really feel the need to bring it up and chat otherwise.

So there is my update I guess. Not too happening, but it has been done either way.

Well intended advice?

Although I do have a few recipes to add, I have been slacking lately. I have a pretty nasty cold right now so lately it has just been soup. I will post more later but right now I think I am just going to write.

So I've spent allot of time defending my actions to people. From Family, To friends, to little old ladies in the stores. I've defended the way we want to raise Elijah, Why I am a stay at home Mom, What Nate and I are going to do on R&R and why I do so many other things. I've heard everything from "You're a new Mom you don't know" to "We have 6 kids, so trust me" and anything in between. I've had complete strangers advise me, I've had family members question me, and friends correct me. It's frustrating.

This morning I sat down to play with Elijah and something dawned on me. I am so sick of explaining myself. When I was little and I would ask my Mom "Why" I can clearly remember her always telling me "I don't explain myself to you". At the time I obviously hated that answer, but the more I think about it the more I like it. I am Elijah's Mom, and short of Nate, it really isn't anyone's business "Why". I could fill this page with a huge explanation as to why about so many things that have been questioned but honestly why should I? Despite how entitled you feel to give advice, or how wrong you think something is, or how overprotective you think I am being it isn't any persons place to ask us to justify anything. Maybe there is something you did differently and you think I am completely backwards but I honestly don't think that gives anyone any right to comment. I would expect it if we were neglecting Elijah or something worse but he hasn't been neglected a day in his life and he has never gone without. I guess I just feel annoyed when someone whats a justification when he isn't even their son. Despite how much it bothers someone that I follow Dr. instructions, or do something a little out of the books, or go exactly by the books he is my child. I am willing to bet some great money that when whom ever had their children they got pretty annoyed receiving well intended advice/questions pertaining to their parenting.

I am never to proud to ask for help, so I guess it just drives me crazy when people want to just jump on in when I haven't asked. I obviously feel comfortable enough that I haven't asked about anything, so please just let me be.

It is a boy!

Well today was an interesting day. I thought my ultrasound was supposed to be tomorrow. Well not thought, it was supposed to be tomorrow at 1. Today at 11 my phone rang and being that it was an IACH number I figured I should answer. Good thing I did. Turned out that the ultrasound technician I was supposed to see tomorrow had and emergency and would be taking her husband to Wichita tomorrow for ER surgery. She said she could see me at 12:30 today though. Well since Nate was at work I told her I'd have to call her back, and since Elijah couldn't go to that appointment I would need to find a sitter. THANK GOODNESS my friend Heather was able to take him, she was lined up to keep him tomorrow but she was good to go today also. Good thing! Nate was able to get home, and I was able go today.

Almost immediately the ultrasound showed what I had already thought, It is in fact a baby boy. We have made most of our phone calls and texts. I think Nate may have a few more calls, I am not sure. We had a few bumps among our texts and phone calls. A few people who made some seriously snide comments but I have chosen to ignore it, and those people. Time to just move on and be thrilled about our child.

Two recipes to make up for yesterday:

Okay so I forgot about my posting yesterday. Not that it really was anything impressive, We only did cottage cheese and pop corn chicken. We had to go shopping after Nate got home from work. It was late when we got back so I didn't have time to cook. Anyway, I will post the egg salad recipe from today and our refried beans.

So I made egg salad for lunch, Figured it was easy and made great sandwiches.
Egg Salad:
5 hard boiled eggs
1/2 cup mayo
2 teaspoons sugar
1 teaspoon basil
1 teaspoons paprika
3 chopped green onions

Peel and chop the hard boiled eggs, Mix all ingredients together! Yum!

I made Mexican food tonight for Nate, since we'd been busy lately and eating all my favorites (Italian mostly) I figured he deserved his favorite foods. I realized after getting everything out that we didn't have refried beans. So it was too google I had to go. I have to say, I do not normally like these beans but this was so yummy!!

Re-Fried beans/ Semi-homemade style:
3 Tablespoons bacon drippings or Vegtable oil
4 gloves garlic
1 Medium Onion
2 Can pinto beans
3 teaspoon cilantro
1 Teaspoon pepper
2 chopped green onions

Heat oil/drippings and add Garlic and Onions. Saute until very soft. Add Beans, Cilantro, and Pepper. Stir until everything is warm. You can either use a potato masher or in my case a blender (I don't have a potato masher). Blend until texture you like. Garnish with a sprinkle of Cilantro and Pepper and serve!

Red Velvet Cake

So I think I may actually try and do a recipe a day in this. Well within reason. I do imagine there will be some days I miss (The day Nate leaves, or when I have the baby) but I will put as many in as I can. I am not an accomplished cook by any means, but I think maybe if I make this challenge for myself I might get allot better! By having to find homemade things I am really gaining knowledge and some great recipes.


Well Elijah has been a crank, Nate was a crank at lunch and I have a BAD headache. So tonight is hamburger helper. Not much to talk about there, but last night I did make a red velvet cake. My favorite, trying to make myself feel better. So here is that recipe, I never did any tweaking to this one, so this is one straight from the Archive! Enjoy!

2-1/2 cups cake flour
1 tsp. salt
1 cup unsalted butter, softened
1-1/2 cups granulated sugar
2 eggs
3 tbsp. unsweetened Dutch-process cocoa powder
1 oz. red food coloring
1-1/2 tsp. pure vanilla
1 cup buttermilk
1 tsp. cider or white vinegar
1 tsp. baking soda

Cooks Note: Use liquid red food coloring, such as McCormick or Durkee; if Wilton's is used, only 1/2 tsp. is needed.

Preheat oven to 350°F for 15 minutes before baking cake.

In a mixing bowl, sift together flour and salt. Set aside.

In a separate mixing bowl, cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy, on medium speed for three minutes. Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition.

In a small bowl, stir together cocoa powder, food coloring and vanilla extract. Beat this into the butter mixture.

Stir 1/3 of the flour mixture into the butter mixture, alternating with 1/2 of the buttermilk, another 1/3 of flour, the remaining buttermilk, and the remaining flour mixture; stir just until blended.

In a cup, combine vinegar and baking soda. Mixture will fizz. Stir this into the batter and combine well.

Divide batter evenly between two greased and floured 9-inch round cake pans.

Bake for about 22 to 28 minutes until a toothpick inserted into center comes out clean.

Allow cakes to cool in pans on a wire rack for 10 minutes. Run a blunt knife along edges of pan to free cake; remove cake gently from pans and cool completely on wire rack.

Crock Pot Chicken

Today was a day to say the least. I left Elijah on his tummy mat for about 10 seconds to go to the bathroom and when I got back he had stripped himself of his diaper and was playing in his poo. He was covered, my carpets was also. So after giving him a bath, and shampooing my carpets I was over it, but seriously, nasty!

Made crock pot herb chicken today. It was so so.
Its obviously chicken breasts, with herbs and garlic. 2 tablespoons of basil, oregano, parsley, garlic, and tyme. I mixed 2 tablespoons of honey with 2 tablespoons lemon juice and added the chicken with 1/4 cup water and let it all simmer on low for 4 hours. It was okay. I don't really like chicken recently though, so that could have a bit to do with it.

Garlic Biscuts

Well today after Church we spoke to the Pastor and we are getting baptized on September 12th. Right after the 10:30 Service. There is a bake sale/pot luck after that also. So we will do that after probably. At least as long as Elijah lets us stay! Anyone who would like to come, it is at First Christian Church in Junction City. Service starts at 10:30am. I understand they do it right after the service. For directions you can visit www.fccjcks.com or just get ahold of me!

Tonight we had the leftover meatballs and spaghetti. I figured I would have some garlic bread, well we didn't have that, so I found a basic biscuit recipe and added to it. Wow yum. Anyone else seeing a pattern with me and posting recipes? Oh well I will continue to post as I continue to bake. Anyone reading this that likes me: For Christmas I would really like a stand mixer, rolling pin and some really nice pyrex mixing bowls. Just saying :)

2 cups sifted flour
2 teaspoons Baking Powder
4 Tablespoons of butter
1/2 tsp. salt
3/4 cup milk
1 tablespoon olive oil
2 tablespoon of garlic
1 teaspoon of the following: Sage, Oregano, Basil, Parsley, Italian seasoning mix
1 Tablespoon Parmesan cheese (Fine Grated)

Mix together the flour, salt, baking powder, spices, and Parmesan cheese. I use a whisk to combine them completely. Cut in the butter and olive oil, I cut the butter into 1 table spoon increments and then mix it in with my fingers one at a time. Dumping the Olive Oil mid way through. Once combined stir in the milk very slowly. Roll dough out onto a clean and floured counter top. I think the dough should be no more than 1/4 inch thick but I make mine thinner. I also don't own a biscuit cutter, but have found for bite size biscuits (Great for dipping in the past sauce) I use a baby food jar. I flip it upside down, using the mouth of the jar to cut through the dough. Bake on 400 degrees for 15-20 minutes. Really watch the time though, I make mine thinner so it was more like 10 minutes for me.

Spaghetti w/ meatballs evening

I find that cooking relaxes me when I am stressed. So not to shockingly after we went to the neighborhood pool we came home and enjoyed some Spaghetti and Meatballs. YUMMO! I will post the recipe below. On a side note however, At dinner Nate and I determined the Berry Syrup from breakfast would also be tasty on plain vanilla Ice cream. So there is another thought for that (See previous blog post for that recipe). I uploaded a few new pictures on Facebook. Oh and tonight we also gave Elijah some small Wheat Noodles (Plain of course) to enjoy. I was told by my Mom and I actually read about it too, that when Mom and Dad eat dinner you should have you child sit at the table with you in their chair. We normally feed him his jars of food before we eat. Then when we eat we sit him down with some Gerber puffs and a Biter biscuit and juice. He's been pretty good about it, and it's also supposed to help with manners and social skills. We will see, but since he doesn't like us out of his site anyhow its really been working out.

The meatballs are to be cooked in the sauce, You can use homemade if you prefer. I will admit though, I use a jar. I have gained the confidence in the kitchen to really start cooking sauces yet. Although I do my own additions to sauce so it becomes mine anyway! Also, I should say that yet again I changed up the meatball recipe to suit our tastes. It came out amazing, and Nate was thrilled to hear the words "Left overs".

Meatballs:
1 pound Hamburger (You could do Turkey or any ground meat you like, If you do turkey though I always add 2 Tablespoons of olive oil because Turkey seems to dry allot)
1/2 cup Italian bread crumbs
1 Egg
1 Teaspoon Oregano, Parsley, Italian blend, Garlic Salt, and sugar
1 Table spoon minced garlic
1/4 cup Parmesan cheese

You combine everything in a bowl, and then form into balls. I put them in the microwave for 60 seconds to help them hold their shape in the sauce.

My additions to a Jar Sauce (For this you need 12oz at least, We thought it needed a little more, but we like alot of sauce):
1/2 Teaspoon of Pancake Syrup
1 Teaspoon Oregano, Parsley, Italian blend, Garlic Salt, and sugar
2 tablespoons of minced garlic


You add the Meatballs to the sauce, and allow to simmer for about 25-30 minutes. I actually went about 30 just to be sure the meat was cooked through.


ENJOY :)

Pancake Morning!

I woke up this morning and chose to make some pancakes. Of course I'm not Suzy homemaker so I went on a search for the box of mix. No luck, We didn't have any left. I went to the trusty google machine! I found a really yummy (And Easy) recipe for homemade from scratch pancakes and berry Syrup! Oh yummy!! I figured I would share, because they were good. I probably wont ever buy syrup or pancake mix again. The recipe I found sounded a little weird to me so I tweaked the recipe. Making my own! I wasn't totally sure Nate would love the berry syrup but shocking to me, he loved it. We paired with Turkey bacon this morning also. Made for an amazing breakfast this morning!

~Pancakes

Dry Mix:
1 1/4 cup flour
2 Tablespoons white sugar
2 teaspoons baking powders
1 teaspoon salt

Wet Mix:
1 Beaten egg
1 cup of milk
2 Tablespoons vegetable oil
1 Teaspoon oil

Directions:
Combine dry ingredients in one bowl. In a separate bowl mix the wet. Create a well in the center of the dry ingredients and pour in the wet. Mix together until smooth.

Cook about 1/8 cup of batter per pancake (This is an estimate. I used a 1/4 cup measure and filled it about half way and dumped it in the pan) in a medium heated skillet. Flip when bubbles raise to the top of the pancake. This recipe made about 10 pancakes using the estimated 1/8 cup batter method.


Berry Syrup:
In a medium saucepan simmer the following until thick, and berries are cooked.
1 1/2 cup frozen berries (This morning I used blueberries)
4 Tablespoons of sugar (I imagine splenda could be used to cut calories/carbs)
Juice of half a lemon (Although I used the concentrate because I am out of lemons, so it was about 2 tablespoons of the lemon juice in a container)

Surgery is coming up

Well we saw the Urologist today, Surgery is scheduled for September 22nd. We have to be there at 06:30. They wont take him back until 07:30 . It pretty much worked out well since Nate will be home on leave anyway to move, so we will just have to take that day as a loss as far as working goes. It will be in Manhattan, rather than JC because the soonest they could get us in JC would be October 8th and they are talking about the guys leaving the first week of October. I asked them to please make it before October. So they said the 22nd would be the first available in Manhattan. We took it.

For anyone who isn't aware of why there is a surgery: When Elijah was born they were going to circumsize him before we left the hospital. Well he ended up being too small, since he was a tiny guy at birth. At his 2 week appointment they decided he was big enough finally. So we gave them the go ahead. Well they started the process, but came to find out that his urethra was on the side of his penis rather than the top. Dr. Meng stopped immediately and sent us straight to JC urology. We met with Dr. Hall who said we shouldn't try to finish the procedure. She said they would use the skin that they normally cut away to re-route his urethra. Unfortunately that was something done from 6-12 months. So we had to wait until today to see her again. She assured us this would all be routine. It apparently happens to baby boys more often than people think, it just isn't something that they talk about much. They will be putting him under, and giving him a children's version of an epidural.

Oh and funny note: Elijah's Dr is Jamaican, and we really love her. Today she asked us what had been happening since she saw us last (His last meeting with her was when he was 6 weeks old) and I said we were expecting. She said "Stand up and let me look at ya". So I did, and she touched my belly and said "It's a girl". We both kinda laughed and said "Really?" and she said "It's a Jamaican thing, not a medical thing". So silly.

Today was a semi productive day. Got my blood drawn to see if I am a carrier for some birth defects (I never did that with Elijah, they never offered me the chance). Then I went to ultrasound and scheduled that, although I wont be sharing the date :) I got my prescriptions filled and bought packing tape. I skipped the glucose test since it was an hour long test and I had Elijah with me. If nothing else I can do it when I go to ultrasound. Nate booked our uhaul for the move, so that is done! I also googled some stain removal ideas for the carpet (rust/wax). Think I might win this one, at least I hope.

Tomorrow I need to make sure I call the cable company about my cable and the move. I also need to call a new fence company. Finally, I need to start packing! I never did that today because some fool in the building chose to spray paint their house. The fumes came in here and made me feel instantly uncomfortable. Cannot wait until we move.

Well this was lame, not sure it even warranted a post! Oh well!

It's always the gloves

Today has been a long day. I woke up this morning feeling dizzy again. It's becoming a little discouraging because the Dr. thinks this is "normal" provided my Glucose and Iron come back normal after I can get to the lab. He put in the tests on Friday but by the time we left the OB clinic the Lab was closed so I have to go tomorrow. If it isn't either thing than its a hormone/pregnancy side effect. Probably one of my least desired one!

Nate told me that he was going to start packing for Iraq. Granted he wont have to leave until October, They need the bags/boxes loaded up for Tomorrow. They need enough time to send them over so they are there before the guys get there. My only side comment to this "It's always the gloves"...... somehow every time he gets a packing list there is some new set of gloves on it and we have to rush to Clothing and sales and get him a new/different pair. It has happened EVERY TIME. This time they were only $15, but normally they are anywhere from $5-$80.

Anyway, I hid in our bedroom and cried while he packed. It never ever bothers me to watch him pack and normally I sit and talk to him while he does. I'm not sure why I was so bothered today. I don't know if it was hormones, as this time around I am way more emotional than I was with Elijah. I guess it could be stress related, Seeing as we have a move and Elijah's surgery (And all the appointments both before and after) and my ultrasound to get in before he leaves. I'm feeling some pressure there. I am sure it was a mix of all those things as well as not feeling well. Either way I felt very ridiculous crying like that, and it isn't something I normally do, but I guess it comes with the territory.

Nate had a dentist appointment on Thursday and they told him they wanted him to have another mouth surgery. Fortunately this one is optional and he decided to wait until he got back from deployment. Apparently since he is a mouth breather the gums around his front teeth are deteriorating, and there was something they were able to do to help that since its also made his teeth sensitive. With the timing though, there isn't time to get it done and for him to heal well before a deployment (And who really wants to deploy being miserable).

We met a new family last night. Well I guess I did, Nate has a soldier named Toby (Streebe) and so I met him last night, and we both met his family. We went over for dinner and to get to know each other. I have several friends out here, but few of them are in PSD with Nate, and none of the ones I knew are deploying. They were a really nice family, and they have a 3yr old, 2yr old, and 1yr old. So that is kind of funny, seeing as I will have a 1yr old and a new born. So it will be nice to have another friend who is going through this with us.

I'm going to start packing tomorrow. Slowly, and steadily. I figure I can get the things out of the way that we wont miss for a month (Movies, Books, storage units, baby things Elijah has outgrown and such). Working closer to the actual move day. Plus I have a friend who runs an Operation Home-front chapter here in KS (A really neat charity that helps military families in need) and she said she could take any hand me down type things for her charity so anything that we don't want/need and that can be donated I will be giving to here. Paying forward our good luck we've had recently.

Well, I haven't updated a thing in a long time! We have been back to Kansas since August 12th. We had a great time home on leave, and it was sad to leave but once home I think we are all very excited to be here. Since coming home, Elijah has been sleeping through the night. Every now and again he wakes up but its about 2 minutes of talking to himself and he is back to sleep! August 7th he got his first tooth, and on the 12th he popped through his second one. He has been taking assisted steps for awhile, but yesterday he actually attempted to crawl. He made it about 3 crawls (I don't exactly know how to describe it, but like steps only crawling) and gave up. He refuses to do it again though. Not sure why, and I am not entirely convinced he actually WANTED to crawl but didn't do it out of desperation.

After getting home, The neighborhood office for McClellan (Were we live now) called and said they were getting near our name on the list and that before we could be offered a home we would need to do a walk through or as she called it a "Pre, Pre-Inspection". We had to pass 100% or pay damages before they would give us a move date/home. Needless to say I was worked up and a little nervous. I scrubbed like a mad women, then discovered they do a black light inspection of carpets! YIKES. Everything I had read on the internet said carpet cleaning solutions would not get the stains out. However I did find that vinegar does, so I used lots of that. We passed 100%, and as of now owe nothing. There is a chance that once all the furniture is out of here that we may owe. We shall see I guess. Fingers crossed!! So we now have a move date (Sept. 17th we sign for keys and Sept. 18th we will move). We have an address also, but I wont be posting that here. If you would like it, please let us know!

Other than this, We have allot of busy coming up before Nate deploys. Hardly much time to even breathe but hey, that is life. We have Dr. appointments, Elijah's surgery, the move and hopefully my ultrasound to cram into a few weeks time. Wish us luck! We will need it.

We saw my Dr. yesterday, and he said everything is looking good. Sent me for some routine blood work (Will have to go Monday) and put in a few prescriptions. I will also be schedualing the ultra sound but I don't think I will share the day of that, just tell people if we are able to find the gender. Last time everyone was so eager to know, and it was disappointing to have to call everyone and say "We don't know, Legs were crossed". So we more than likely will not share the date, but if we can find out we will call everyone the day of and say "It's A......". If Nate isn't home, I wont say a word until he knows anyway. It isn't fair for everyone to know before him. He will be the first to hear other than myself.

Nate's car is down, so we are back to only 1 car for a bit. We found someone who will fix it though, so I am not worried. Just waiting on payday to get the part. We have to get it fixed since it's sitting at Nate's work and we can't leave it there forever. Plus we will need to get it to our new home anyway.

I think that is about all as far as updates, Just waiting not so patiently on the move!

I don't know how to tell people

I think everyone reading this is well aware that Nathan is going to Iraq, again. That he has just spent the month in NTC training. During that time, Elijah and I came home to Ohio for our visit. Like everything in life, there have been pro's and con's to this trip. Obviously I love being around family, and friends who are helping this time go by quickly (I pick Nate up on Monday already!). I am grateful that Elijah is finally meeting family that he hadn't yet, and I am thrilled to see him thrive in Ohio and to see he doesn't hate it.

I think however, this trip has added to the deployment anxiety, and missing Nate. I know everyone means well, but everyday I go someplace without fail I get asked "Did you talk to Nate today". If I haven't it makes me sad to think about it, when I am not asked all the time, I don't realize he hasn't called. It's easier to press on. Then the conversation immediately turns to deployment. Neither of us (Nate has told me this also) want to talk about it 24/7. I understand that people have general curiosity but it is daily! The information we have doesn't change, and if it did we would let everyone know. Then after the the deployment talk the topic then goes to the new baby, and how Nate is going to miss that. We are aware of that, painfully aware but being reminded all the time doesn't help us at all. I guess I just want to be home and not have to have the above talk daily, Nate doesn't either. We are trying to get through the time prior to the deployment living in the moment, not looking to the upcoming events. I don't know how exactly to tell people that we don't want to talk about it, without it seeming rude. Nate and I spent allot of time talking about this the other night, because it was just getting to me. It is easier to face this thing with a strong mind and tough attitude when you aren't thinking about it 24/7.

The thing that gets the most is when people tell me just how hard having a baby while Nate is gone will be, since I will have a 12 month old. As if we hadn't thought about it before. Sometimes I wonder how much thought is going into statement being made. I'm not saying anything ill about the baby, just that hearing that at least once a day weighs on you also.

Elijah is 7 months :)

Elijah is 7 months old now. It blows my mind because it doesn't feel like that. He is moving like crazy, and eating more than a horse! He is learning to sit on his own, although after a bit he tries to stand (Landing on his face). If you stand him up and have him lean on something he can stay there for about 10 minutes. Loves the jumper! He is speaking also. He is a big bucket of drool, so I assume a tooth is on the way. I know it is weird, but I am in no hurry to have him get teeth. I have read up on the topic and the longer the tooth takes the healthier it remains. That is the 7 month update I think!

FIRST WORDS

Elijah has been "Saying" things for the past few weeks, but I've been brushing it under the table because I thought 7 months wasn't late enough (7 months this week) and that I was hearing what I wanted too. It's been "Maaaaa" and "Daaaaa" and occasionally we would get a "Maaaam" or a "Daaaaaad" but again, I thought they were happy accidents.

Today I am convinced they are true words! True, honest, and deliberate words. I was carrying him back to go to bed. I laid him down after hugging him and saying "Mommy loves you". As I was leaving the room, clearly I heard "Mommy". I'm now working on evidence, lol. How big is this child getting, I mean WORDS?? Real Words now?

Update, Again

We had an OB appointment on July 1st, and I was exactly 12 weeks. We saw the little baby, very cute! They say everything looked great, although when we go back I have to have a few tests done :( Not looking forward to that at all!

My travels have found me in Ohio. We left Kansas on July 2nd, Made it finally on the 3rd. Elijah was not into driving though so we had to get a hotel and relax for like 5 hours, But we made it!

Nate has made it to NTC, he left July 4th. I don't mind him being gone so much, its only a month before I will see him again (August 2nd he catches a flight to Ohio) but I hate what it implies. The implication being deployment. Not that its a shock, We even have an estimated (Loose Estimate) of the deployment dates. It's just coming at us so fast and the pregnancy hormones are really taking hold of my brain here. Ugh I am not ready, even if I did have a long time to get used too the idea.

Since coming to Ohio I haven't stopped moving though, and I think it may have caught up to me. My back is so sore, bending feels impossible! Raw deal, When you have an infant. Everyone today has said to me today that I am looking sleepy, I'm not really, I'm just in pain. The only thing you can take is freaking Tylenol! It so doesn't work, and only makes me feel sick! ERG. We have been visiting and visiting. I think that there is only a handful of people we have missed, but I hope to get them soon. I think if my back is hurting this bad tomorrow I may not leave tomorrow to go anyplace. Wed we are going to Aunt Jen's for swimming and lunch!

Anyhow my trip has been fun so far, just waiting on Nate to arrive.

Hmph!

If you haven't heard, We are expecting #2. Shock, yes. Unplanned, You bet. A little stressful, Of course!

I wasn't feeling great, and was craving bizarre food so Nate jokingly suggested I may be pregnant. At first I laughed it all off. I mean come on, I am nursing and on the pill. It took fertility drugs to get Elijah. There is no way, right?? Well the doubt slowly sunk in, until about 9am the next morning when I decided I couldn't take it anymore. I told myself, Go to the store. It will be negative and then you can put this silly pregnancy idea to rest. Nate said maybe we'll try after deployment, we will try then. hahahaha not even the full 10 minutes, not even 1 full minute and I was staring at 2 lines. I didn't beleive it at first, I checked and double checked and re-read all directions. Sure enough, it was positive. I called Nate, who at first thought I was playing a trick. I think when I started to get irritated with him he figured it out. We made an appointment immediately to go to the lab and have them confirm. Yep, they called about an hour later "Mrs. Kyser you are expecting. You need to call up to OB".


Now, This being a shock at first I cried a little thinking about it all. Elijah is just 5 months old. Nate is getting ready to deploy and honestly this is WAY faster than we expected. How is it we had to try so hard with Elijah and this one just happens? After an hour or two I told myself although we could look at all the negatives and hows what is the point. This baby is coming, and is a gift. All babies are gifts. I know it is going to be hard, and feel impossible, but I can do it.

That being said, I think I've been blaming allot on the "Pregnancy Hormones" but I don't think it is the culprit at all. I think it is stress. Anyone who has had to plan for a deployment knows from about a month prior to NTC and on is nothing but stress. Deployment rumors, and horror stories, fears, doubts and insane amounts of resentment (I will admit it) all weigh in on you also. Then there is the moving. Since we are pregnant we qualify for a 3 bedroom now, And the move is supposed to happen in 2-4 months. Not to mention there is a trip to Ohio to plan, OB appointments, and my work (It is failing terribly by the way). I guess I am at a place right now were I have so much stress and I am so emotional that everything and everyone immediately becomes a target. I don't even think its the move/pregnancy as much as another deployment. Ugh I would love to stomp, scream and cry and throw a fit but it wont do any good! I just feel helpless and unhappy. I don't want to do this. I keep picturing him getting on that bus again, and it makes me want to throw up and cry. I keep thinking about the "What ifs" and the long year I am in for. I guess also it is frustrating because I don't have many friends here to begin with and the ones I have are getting their husbands back within the next few months. The entire time Nate is gone all my friends will have their husbands home. That is going to be tough. I don't feel like I have many friends to just talk to out here. I feel like I am the one everyone vents too, and when I need to vent or cry no one is there. Then I end up resenting everyone for it. I mean I know I have my family, but I would kill for a best friend right now that is able to just hear me out and let me cry. I don't mind being a good listener for people but at some point it would be great to have the favor returned.

I think among all the things just listed I am so sick of hear "You are so strong". You know what I am not, I do it because I have too. I don't get a choice in any of it. The army didn't ask me what I wanted, its done. I don't feel strong, and I wish people were able to just see that I really feel pretty broken hearted and I am not strong. Hearing how "Strong" I am all the time just makes me feel worse when I am having a bad day, or a day were I need to vent. Then it makes me feel like I haven't lived up to something.

I feel frustrated I guess.Time to count blessings: I am so excited for this new baby, but at the same time I am completely lost and lonely. Such is life though. Good news is our new house is going to be brand new construction. The upstairs neighbors moved out. The military is going to move us, and the couple moving into #3 seem normal so far. Elijah is growing well and is so active.

And before it is asked of me: No I will not be completely moving home to Ohio during deployment. However I will be delivering baby 2 in Ohio. When Nate leaves I will be heading home (October/November) and having the baby. Then when the baby is about 6 weeks I will come back to KS. This way if I get bedrest, or have a bad delivery I have all my family to help me. I just don't want to move entirely there.

It is just my opinon folks!

So I post on a separate website often. It's intention is for all of us here at Ft. Riley to be able to vent, talk, ask for advice and so on with each other. Sometimes I get annoyed enough with something to write on there. Anyhow, I thought I would copy and paste the 2 biggest topics I have started lately.

Stay at Home Moms:

Okay so for those of you that have me as a friend on Facebook saw me go on a bit of a rampage last evening. My family, complete Strangers and some "friends" recently have been irritating me to the point of explosion. And I may have taken it out on Facebook nation.

It seems like whenever you get asked "What do you do for a living" it begins a nasty battle. I am a Stay At Home Mom, a PROUD stay at home Mom. I wear that badge as one of my best accomplishments. However the general public dosen't seem to always understand this. I get everything from "Oh so unemployed" - Okay so I am not getting paid in cash for my work, but I am getting paid in baby smiles and bonding time. Sure that wont pay a bill, but it fills my heart. I get from friends "Since you aren't doing anything anyway......" What makes you think I am not doing anything? I do lots and lots thanks! Or from FRG and other clubs "Well you have time to volunteer, you don't work and you have time".... Wrong!

I happen to have my son on a pretty rigid schedule and I have a clean home. I have dinners cooked, and activities planned. Why is it because I have chosen this path in life I am looked down upon? It isn't as though I am staying home and neglecting him, eating cake and watching TV. I am a very active part in my sons life. We keep very busy!

I guess the main thing that bothers me is that these people try and make you feel bad for it. I mean I obviously understand everyone has their own view on parenting. Everyone has their own styles, and preferences. I respect that, What I do not respect is someone trying to force their ways on me. I don't run up to every Mom and say "Disposable diapers, your horrible" or "You work, what a bad Mom" so why do people want to do that to me?! I don't tell anyone how to do things, they need to not tell me how to do things also.

Another important thing to keep in mind is daycare isn't cheep out here. I would end up giving my entire check to someone to watch Elijah so I can work. Literally. I have priced daycare. I think I would bring home $50 and that is it. What's the point in missing out on EVERYTHING for $50?

My Second topic was about planned pregnancy to avoid a deployment:

There is something bothering me, and as an adult I would like to have a calm and intelligent discussion about it. I'm really hoping that it happens, and that this dosen't turn into a huge dramatic mess like things have a habit of happening.

I have a friend who recently joined the army. I am pretty happy for her, except I was talking to her and I said "Is your new unit scheduled to deploy anytime soon?" She told me that she wasn't sure, but not that she'd heard. Then she said "It isn't like I'd deploy anyway, I would get pregnant to avoid it"

I kind of took a step back. I was pretty irritated about it, I wont lie. I was talking to my husband later about it and I said "I have very little respect for females that get pregnant to avoid a deployment". I was thinking about it more, trying to see all sides of it, and honestly the more I thought about it the more upset it made me. Not only are you bringing a life into the world based on a desire to NOT do something, but I feel its shamefully done.

I realize I have never gotten on that plane myself, so I can't say I know the feelings that go on. I have put my husband on a plane though, and I know that side. I can't say "I understand you are afraid" or anything along those lines. However I do feel like YOU signed a contract and joined a military knowing it was a time of war. If this is the first time the thought of a deployment has crossed your mind, well you didn't think joining through. I think its a breach of contract personally. I understand accidents do happen, but to intentionally plan to get pregnant to avoid something is just plain irresponsible (You are letting down your unit) and dishonest.

I got to thinking about it more also, because there are men that avoid a deployment by claiming to have this or that. I was thinking about how this is the female version of that. I guess I have no respect for anyone intentionally dodging deployment.

Now don't get me twisted, I understand there are legit things that keep you from deploying. I understand things happen and that you may not be 100% healthy. I am not knocking those people! If you are hurt, honestly hurt, this isn't my complaint. If you got pregnant on accident then okay. I guess I am saying if you are intentionally avoiding a deployment I have no respect for you. I guess it might sound mean, but that is how I feel. How do you feel??



So there were the opinions, and I guess I felt strongly enough about both topics to post here! LOL.

Ugh, I'm just going to stop promising that I will update this and we will assume that I will update when I update.

Anyway, Things are going well. My first Mothers day was Sunday. Great day! I told Nate its crazy how all last year I would say "This time next year you have to be nice to me". Haha! He was very nice though, and made me breakfast, Lunch and Dinner. Plus he let me take a ton of naps. Sleep I think should be the automatic gift to any mother who is celebrating her first mothers day. Just saying :)

Other than that, We really don't have allot going on. Trying to make plans about going to Ohio (And budget so I can actually make the trip, Ugh I miss 2 incomes) and then trying to stay calm. Apparently some people (Female soldiers) we know are planning on gettting pregnant so they don't have to deploy. Don't even get me started about how repulsive I find this. Then he may switch Units before the deployment. Dates change all the time (Don't they always) and family from Michigan is wanting to meet up with us when we are home too. Headaches.

I posted a video to Facebook of Elijah feeding himself. Before you laugh, he really did manage to feed himself. That's right, my 4.5 month old is a genius. We were able to get out some of his 3-6 month clothing. Not much though. He is so small.

Well that was my condensed update, as I was eating while Elijah was sleeping and thought I'd update but thanks to the neighbors, Elijah is awake now. I cannot wait to move out of this place.

Maybe someday

I keep telling myself that eventually I will make it back to regular postings in this! I keep thinking "As the baby gets older maybe I will have time".....Wow can we say naive? I have absolutely had NO more time than I did 4 months ago. Of course I keep adding more things to my proverbial plate and this could be why. I happen to have a serious issue, as soon as I see free time in my days on a regular basis I cram something new into it. I started selling Mary Kay about 2 Months ago. It is going so slow I am questioning why I even did it. My team leader makes so much money that I thought "Hey that looks neat". I should have reminded myself that Nikki had experience is sales, and me, well I am a darn good waitress/carry-out girl. Nikki was a Realtor, then she sold Cars and then insurance. Nikki is the type of girl that can sell an Ice cube to a penguin in Antarctica at full price. She is just plain amazing. It seems like no matter how many sales, promotions and freebies I advertise I am just getting no were. She is supposed to help me out and teach me some sales tools so maybe I can get more business. Here is to hoping.

Nate and I started attending Church, And we really like it! We are going to First Christian Church in Junction City. I love it, and we are also doing some private Bible study with the pastor on Wednesday night. We are really getting into this, and even inviting friends. I like it, it makes me feel more at peace with everything. Ironically though it seems like if you tell people that you are going to Church the automatically assume something is wrong in your marriage or you're dying. Apparently you aren't to find Jesus without a traumatic event! I can say it has helped us not be so negative, but we definitely weren't going through anything terrible.

After a long talk with Nikki (She was my friend well before this Mary Kay stuff) I came to realize I have become incredibly complacent in my life style and this is what was killing my heart about Nate's job. I mean in reality, Nate has had it pretty easy since coming home from Iraq. He has been here 2 years, and only gone to 1 school at another post and been in the field maybe 3 times. He hasn't done anything like that in the past year. No wonder the idea of deployment/NTC makes me want to scream. I have gotten used to saying "I need you home" and him getting the day off. Recently that hasn't been happening and I've let it bother me. She snapped me back to reality with "Tina you were so strong, you did 15 months without a second thought, what happened?"................ It sent me into my search for the big girl panties.......... Seriously why was I being an obnoxious puddle of goo? I mean he is in the Army after all, DUH he is going someplace and hello I got 2 years with him, that is amazing for the Army. What is my problem? That isn't to say I am not afraid of the "What if's" and the fact that he'll leave just before Elijah turns 1 and will miss allot of really cool stuff that happens between one and two is sad, but I can do this. We have a video camera, and I have cameras and internet!

Elijah was 10 pounds 12 ounces last weight check. I was a little annoyed because when we had him in on the 7th his normal Dr. said as long as he was gaining we weren't going to worry about the numbers. The graph weight gain, so as long as the line went up he wasn't concerned about the rate. Well the 20th was his 4 month evaluation and it wasn't Dr. Meng. It was some other pediatrician we'd never seen before and he kept telling me how he was concerned about the weight and this that and another. I called Dr. Meng and he said no, don't be worried, and everything was fine. We did learn Elijah may have asthma or just really bad allergies. There isn't much they can do for diagnosis right now as he is too small, we just have to watch him. I think its allergies, I have the worst allergies myself!!

I went back to the Dr. on the 27th. I no longer have to worry about cervical cancer!!I think it will always be on my mind but he said I had 3 clear biopsy's and that I was good to go for a year. I went on the 28th to my regular Dr. for allergy medication. I was a little irritated when he said to me "Well nursing Mom's don't have many options, They do make Formula you know. I think you should switch anyway, 4 months is good enough"...... I know there are at least 2 allergy medications you can take while nursing #1 and #2 who are you to tell me what to do as far as nursing? I mean honestly it bothered me allot. I love nursing, and I think its one of the reasons I am so close to my son. I plan to continue until he can get cows milk. He does get a supplement feeding maybe twice a day, no more than 8 oz of formula a day. Mostly because I just can't keep up but the rice/oatmeal cereal has really helped that. Plus he has started juice. I have only tried Apple and Grape so far as I am easing into it. I want to spot allergies as quickly as possible. He was so so with Apple but he LOVED the Grape. This kid is a sucker for Grape. Obviously its very diluted but he loves it none the less.

Other than that we are just being the cute happy family, I uploaded some videos to Facebook and I send pictures there all the time. Hope everyone is well and they can check out the videos.

Well its about time I update

Well Brandi is back to KS. I am so excited to have my pal back. Not that I don't have other friends but Brandi and I have been friends since Nate and I got married. We went through NTC #1 together, We went through deployment #1, and living at the Bluffs. I am just so happy she is back. (She moved home for deployment). So this week I hung out with her. We went to lunch and the mall the one day. The next we enrolled our boys in the CDC together.

Speaking of the CDC I enrolled Elijah in hourly care. I figured I am going to have a mess of Doctors appointments coming up and that you know what, Instead of having Nate take off (He is more than happy to do so) I would send Elijah to hourly to play with other babies and I would just go. No husband required! I have him scheduled for 11am-1pm Monday. I have to admit I am so nervous about leaving him. It makes me want to cry really.

Oh Elijah is eating rice cereal now! I am doing it on the spoon though, No bottle. Every night before bed I am giving him a few ounces and he sleeps a little better. I'm still nursing him all the time, gosh this kid eats allot. Formula here and there, but not much. I guess he is growing, wouldn't really know because I don't have a scale. He seems to weigh a metric ton while I am nursing.

I had an argument with Picerne (The Military housing office) yesterday. Supposedly they are going to handle it, and they better by Monday or I think Nate might loose it. They send us a warning about dog poop and there were really only 2 turds in the yard. I clean it up every evening. Okay fine, Maybe I should be doing it as soon as it happens but we've called every week about the dog upstairs. His owners let him use the rest room on the balcony (Above ours) and rinse it down onto mine and they throw their cigarette butts down into my yard. The guy in #2 hasn't taken his trash out since he moved in (7 months) it just piles up on his patio.... but they want to give us the warning..... I mean yea okay its a warning. Not a huge deal, but they got nothing!!

Anyway, Nate and I were talking about moving home.....Again. Seems like every entry has this theme. I guess right now I am just wondering if its for the best. I mean I want to be around family, and being debt free sounds great too. I just wonder how happy I will be living in my old room with 3 dogs and my son. I haven't lived at home in forever. Am I going to annoy my parents? I mean I know Its for the best but I don't want to move all my crap into storage and have to worry about that either. Or worry about finding a house when he gets home. I just flat out don't. Then again it dosen't seem like I have much of a choice......

We had our family picture taken. I don't know if I am going to buy more though. It was $10 for an 8x10 professionally taken. I really want a package but I just don't know if I want to spend the $$ on them. Its expensive! Hope I sell a ton of Mary Kay and can buy them.....

Other than that I think those are my updates for now.

Wow! So I am happy we are already on post and once we leave we wont be moving back on! Apparently they are going to start making people pay a pet deposit before they move in. Starting April 1st! Those who are already here are grandfathered. It is a $150 deposit, and if you already live on post and get a pet you have to pay it too. That is fine, I already have my 3 and that is the limit but it sucks for others. Of course the same article said that there were like $1000,000 in pet damages in 2009 alone. So I can see how that makes sense but at the same time I am a darn good pet owner and I clean my yard every few days. I shampoo my carpets once a week even if they didn't have an accident and I vacuum almost every day. They don't chew things up or anything. Bad seeds ruin it for all.

Elijah and I had a pretty good day. We did wake up at 0500 though, so I put his clothes away and straightened up his room. Nate went to PT and I started cleaning our room and soaking all of Elijah's diapers in some borax because the shells were getting stinky. That solved it right away though! I made some breakfast for us, French toast and bacon. I scrambled up some eggs for Nate. I don't eat eggs so it wasn't for me. I packed his lunch and sent him on his way. I spent the rest of my day deep cleaning my house and doing laundry.

I am having some concerns about Elijah's weight though! He was 9 pounds 7 ounces on the 26th and he was the same yesterday. That is a pretty big span of time without change. I'm not sure if its a diffrence in scales or what. Maybe I am over thinking it but still.

Anyway....time to sleep

Sick Baby :(

At 7:30 this morning I called and got Elijah a Dr. appointment. I finally caved seeing as he slept very little the night prior and you could just hear the congestion. Well they saw us at 11:10 and it was a really tiny Korean lady. She was kind of hard to understand but she said it is just his first cold. Well that was one first I could have done without, but I guess it was coming. She said he was otherwise alright. Keep up with the Tylenol and to get a humidifier. Well I had one from last winter but I when I plugged it in it didn't work. I thought it was because I stored it outside in the storage closet. So I went to Target to buy him a new one. I got the same one because its only $14, and the others are $30. I got Elijah some baby vapor rub, Tylenol, Saline solution and sucker bulb. When I got home and read the instructions for the darn humidifier and you are supposed to add SALT! So low and behold the old one works too!! Oh well, I was thinking we could use 2 of them since we are in and out of the living room and bedroom all day. Plus the extra water in the air will help our dry skin and our colds as well. Kansas is so dry and uncomfortable.

He weighed in at 9 pounds 7 ounces and I am a little concerned about that, but we will bring that up at his regular Dr. He is still nursing and gets like 4oz of formula a day for the Iron. He gets the vitamins they gave to us but I like him to have the extra help. The Dr thought his cloth diapers were neat. I guess she hasn't seen that kind before because she was asking all about them. I think they are great, and Elijah seems to do well with them. Another bonus is that Bridget isn't the least bit interested in them. I looked under the bed today and saw that she has been taking disposables under the bed and shredding them up! That dumb dog is very trying sometimes! At least they were unused. Although when he was first born she loved the used ones too. She got the most recent ones out from under his bassinet. There are two storage containers and she gets the dry ones I keep for just in case situations and shreds them up! Annoying. So I emptied the boxes out so she can't get anything out.

The humidity has really helped Elijah out though, so that is great! Hopefully it keeps going alright.

Oh My

Well the baby is sick, The Daddy is sick, and the Mommy is sick. Nate brought it home to us, and he is about over it. Then Elijah got it, YUCK, and I got it. I sent Nate a text this morning and told him I wasn't sure I could do it on my own today so he talked to CSM Jones and came home after lunch. Thank God too because I passed out for like 4 hours in the afternoon. We all have stuffy noses and fevers.

We had my appointment on the 26th. That was annoying. I guess one of my stitches dissolved before I healed so I was still bleeding some, so Dr. Sessions put something on there the cut to seal it up. I have another biopsy coming up because they said that my Cervix looks like there may be more pre-cancer cells again. Not to thrilled about that, I can't help but feel like that just leads to another removal. Those are painful and I just don't have any interest in that. It is so annoying. Nate keeps saying just be positive maybe it is nothing. Oddly enough that is what he said last time. I told him that I was tempted to just not let them do anything because I am afraid of the pain, but I know I don't have a choice.

Oh I had a dental appointment the other day. Yea that sucked equally as much as my other appointments. I guess I have to get xrays next week then I have to see an oral surgeon. I guess my wisdom teeth are directly under my molars and the only way to get them out is to take them out the side. The worst part is that I have to pay allot of money for this because Tricare dental is crap. I don't know for sure how much yet, but I imagine it wont be cheap because they put you to sleep and do all 4. I wouldn't have it any other way though, I would never do it without being put to sleep. I want the 4 to come out at once because if I feel that once I will not do it again (See above paragraph). So anyone who wants to pay for that send me an email :) Just kidding...........sort of.

My visit with my Grandma Horn was amazing and her and Elijah had a blast together. Dropping her off was very sad but I will be home in July. Just keep telling myself that.

Dear Army

It's been some time since I wrote in here. Anyone that's had an infant with colic might understand why. Anyhow I guess there are tons of things on my mind. I guess mostly about the "D" word.............. I am 100% panic stricken already. I just remember how quick it slapped us in the face last time. I know it seems insane to be worried already when its only February. I mean NTC is tentatively set for July, and deployment anytime from Oct.-November. I know I have time, and honestly I am not even sad for me right now. I mean I did it last time, it sucked, but I survived. It blows that Elijah is going to miss his Dad on his Birthday and so many other events. I swear if I hear one more person tell me "That's how it goes" or "You knew what you were getting in to" or anything of that nature, or tell me how they did it just fine I will loose my mind. It seems like anyone that you run into says something like that, and I am just plain over it. I don't ask to be worried or sad. I don't WANT to feel like there is an impending doom coming up, and the thought of that and being the physical equivalent of a single Mom almost makes me want to run away from the whole mess. I would love to talk to him about NTC of the next deployment and not feel like I might cry. I would love to make plans for that year and not think twice about about the fact that Nate will miss it. I feel like I can't vent to anyone about it because I get to hear about their last deployment and how they handled it, or how I'm being weak, or I knew what I was doing when I said "I do".

Anyway, Other than that my Grandma is coming to KS on the 27th. Elijah has an appointment on the 23rd. I have a few scattered in there as well.

My Mary Kay website is up and running from what I could tell. That was exciting to me to find out. So everyone can start ordering :)

Cloth Diapers

Elijah spent the whole day in cloth diapers today, and it was nice for both Mommy and him. We bought a type called "Gro Babies". There is a shell, and on the inside of the diaper are two snaps. They have these liners that also have snaps, so you snap them into the liner as you need. You only have to change the shell like every day to 3 days depending on how messy they get and what your baby does, the liner you change every time. They also have these things called "Boosters" that you can place on top of the liner (It dosen't snap though) to add extra absorbancy. You really only need those at night or when you know your baby might be in them for awhile. Normally I use them at night or like today when I went to my appointment. So I bought 5 shells, and a ton of boosters and liners. NICE. I like them so far. The liners have 3 size settings, so they grow with the baby. I think its a wise investment and will be great!!

Elijah is doing so well! He is going to be 6 weeks old tomorrow! Isn't that crazy?! It feels like just yesterday. He rolls over, but really only when HE wants too and not a moment before. WE got his cloth diapers in the mail finally, he is so dainty though that it makes him look weird. His diapers are so bulky, He will grow into them I know, but right now he looks silly. Oh well, its going to be worth it in the end.

Updating

Wow I haven't written in a long long time. After that shock, this entry is bound to be long and probably cover a few different things.

Elijah is well, We took him to his 2 week appointment and they were going to attempt to circumsize him. They actually started the process, and Nate and I were in the room. They stopped almost immediately though (They did cut some of him though) and said they couldn't go any further. They were sending us the the Urologist on call at Junction Cities hospital. Apparently my son's urethra is not on the top but the side. This can cause problems later in life. So Around August Elijah is going to have to go in for Surgery. They cannot preform it prior to 6 months of age. I told them they needed to do it while Nathan was home though. So we go back on august 5th to do his pre-op appointment things. At his last appointment (Last Wed.) he was weighing in at 7 pounds even. Most other babies we know of are WAY bigger than him. Even the ones born after him. He is just a little guy I guess. He can still wear his NB clothing and it actually still looks gigantic on him. Also on last Wed. Nate was sitting on the bed before work with Elijah and I. I laid him down on the bed and he rolled over 2 times in a row. I can only assume he'd done it prior to that too because Nate had put Ruby in our bedroom before PT and woke us up. Being a sleepy Mommy I laid Elijah in out bed with hims regular pillow wall, I laid him on his back of course. He was on his tummy 5 minutes later. He hasn't done it too much since then though, I don't really know why, I guess he is just over it. He has done it a few times, but never when I have the camera or when I want him too.

I think he has colic, Well actually I don't but after 2 hours of Google this morning I guess I just wonder. For the past 2 days he will scream when any place but in my arms, and even then he must be upright. He is kind of okay with his swing if its in the upright position. He wants nothing to do with laying on his back. I can lay him on my chest sometimes, and that helps allot. Last night he screamed bloody murder from 8:30pm to 12:30am..... He only calmed down I am convinced because I took a warm bath with him and fed him. I think he wore himself out from crying. It didn't last long though, only about 2 hours, and then it was all over again. I am wondering if Gripe Water would do anything, its what google suggests. Mylacon isn't doing anything. He still is too young for Tylenol according to most articles and Tylenols website.

I am doing alright, and so is Nathan. I guess NTC is going to be around July so I will be in Ohio then. We originally thought it would be May/June but I guess the Army had other plans. It moved back though, which is odd. Around November they were saying April/May and its slowly moved back. No I am not thinking something stupid like he wont be deployed, I know he will, I just think the Army is doing the good ole' "Hurry up and Wait" thing. When he deploys I will be moving home. I know a few people are unhappy about this, and I know that they have their own opinions but for us I know we can save more money if I go home and I personally think if I can take that year home to make sure Elijah knows his family than I am going too. If I know we can save more money if I am home, then I will. There is nothing in Kansas for me when Nathan is gone anyway, The only reason I live in this state is because of him so if he isn't even here then why should I be here. I honeslty let it bother me at first that people didn't like the idea but Nate and I were talking about it the other day and I looked right at him and said "Well if she thinks it is stupid I am moving home then Elijah and I don't have to stop by and see her right?". The way I see it anymore is that I realize everyone does things differently. I know that what is right for one may not be right for others. Maybe staying in Kansas would be better for some people, but for me, in my personal situation it is not. I don't feel the need to comment on what others do in their marriage or situations, I sure do wish some wouldn't share their comments with me. I am going to do what Nathan and I figure is best for us. If you can't support us then I just feel sorry for you. Like I say though, I know there are plenty of those who don't agree with what we do. I just don't really care anymore.

We spent the day looking at cloth diapering systems, I think I finally picked the ones I want. We are going to do the Gro Baby brand. They are expensive, but they are one size fits all, they get the best reviews on amazon and obviously re-usable. Well worth it I think.

Time to go, Elijah is angry.

He made his apperance :)

Well if you don't know by now, and I doubt that as Nate shouted it from roof tops, Our son was born on December 23rd. Ironically this date is honestly really ironic to us. December 22nd is our wedding anniversary, and December 23rd is my Grandparents wedding anniversary. Elijah was born on my Grandparents 53rd anniversary! How cute.

So labor wasn't pleasant, and I am in no big rush to do that one again. I had contractions for a few days prior but they weren't strong enough or close enough together to get admitted. Finally at 3am on the 23rd I woke up Nate and said "I can't take it, lets go".... I informed him on the way that I definitely had no intention of having a natural delivery because these things sucked, LOL. They made me walk around and lay on monitors in Triage until about 6am. They kept saying they might send me home, even though the contractions were 5 min apart and I was 4cm. My Dr. came in at 7am though and admitted me, Thank you Lord for epidurals. I am so serious right now. The next 10 hours were a mix of annoying and weird. My blood pressure was high, and so they kept flipping out about that. Then a little later they were concerned about Elijah because I would contract hard and his heart rate would drop. They said it was because the contractions were too close together. So they gave me a drug to slow them down. Then they broke my water, and then they were concerned again about the heart rate dropping. This time it wasn't because of contractions it was just dropping. Later they decided he was safe and fine, so they started Pictosin. At about 6pm my Epidural stopped working all together, so they came and redid it. Then at like 9:30pm they determined I should start pushing, but they took their time starting that. I pushed for about an hour, and then they realized that Elijah was face up, rather than down. So the whole time I was pushing I was basically pushing him into my pelvic bone and not moving him much. So my Dr. (Who hate Cesareans by the way) told me we could use clamp and get him born. So we opted to do that.

At 10:41pm my son was born, and he is perfect. He weighed 5 pounds 13 ounces. He was 20 inches long. What a great baby :)

He was born with a fever, but it went away pretty quick. Unfortunately because he did have the fever they had to do IV anti-biotics for 48 hours. I had a fever too, so I had to have the anti-biotics as well. We both got some rest and food and we were better. We did have to spend Christmas in the hospital though. As long as my family was together I didn't care.

So there ya go, My son was born!!